Blind Spot in the Mirror

Blind Spot in the Mirror

My bathrooms dirty and I am free of desire to change it.
My mirror has evaporation spots should I be bothered that I am unbothered

I stare and pose.
My self confident fluxgates faster then the mussels in my face move.

I notice the lumps of dough hanging off the side of my torso and so I gyrate the limbs on my body for thirty seconds.
I can now confidently tell myself I have don’t exercise today, despite not leaving my apartment.
I am such a fatty.

Isolation leaves one constantly feeling like they are the greatest and the worst at everything.
Perhaps the thought I am having now are the most original and thought provoking thoughts any human has ever had.
On second thought, maybe every human has had similar thoughts but dismissed them because they understood the banality of them.

There is no one to judge, so why be someone miserably feeling sorry for myself.
Its not that I am feeling sorry for myself it is that I question the legitimacy of myself.

Isolation produces my most introspective thoughts.
Though no one wants to hear someone whine
But am I whining or am I sharing

My eyes are quite lovely
Other then shades of purple underneath them and the forehead that creeps over.
How many times can my eyes deceive my eyes before I understand I can cure my blindness with eye drops that reveal a potentially painful truth?

Would that have been an amazing or sappy metaphor to end this poem on?
Can this even really be considered a poem?

Timing

I am in love with time
I want you when he wants you
The anxiety to have you causes me to yearn
The apathy of you being alone is like poison
Is it that I crave others validations of you
Is it that I crave the fact that I could and now I can’t

I sit and I wonder what should have been
My shame brings pity which brings apathy
Apathy breeds content satisfaction
I sit and I waist away at nothing real
All the while wondering if nothings real

Am I smarter then I used to be
I am more arrogant then I used to be
What if I made you mine
Would I stop loving me as much as I loved you
I would be less impressive
Would we be more impressive
I continue to love time
How long will I continue to love you


(updated)

Your availability cause apprehension
Why didn’t they want you
Why should I want you
What is wrong with me
I need to know that it is good because I said so
But loose wires unscramble my simple complexity

Tell me there is urgency and I will crave
Why should you have to cater to such absurdity?
You are better then I am
An upper hand is worthless when no one is playing
The belief that time is infinite is not true
So why does one believe it so