Timing

I am in love with time
I want you when he wants you
The anxiety to have you causes me to yearn
The apathy of you being alone is like poison
Is it that I crave others validations of you
Is it that I crave the fact that I could and now I can’t

I sit and I wonder what should have been
My shame brings pity which brings apathy
Apathy breeds content satisfaction
I sit and I waist away at nothing real
All the while wondering if nothings real

Am I smarter then I used to be
I am more arrogant then I used to be
What if I made you mine
Would I stop loving me as much as I loved you
I would be less impressive
Would we be more impressive
I continue to love time
How long will I continue to love you


(updated)

Your availability cause apprehension
Why didn’t they want you
Why should I want you
What is wrong with me
I need to know that it is good because I said so
But loose wires unscramble my simple complexity

Tell me there is urgency and I will crave
Why should you have to cater to such absurdity?
You are better then I am
An upper hand is worthless when no one is playing
The belief that time is infinite is not true
So why does one believe it so